So, I need to work on forgiving. We all need to forgive in order to get to a good place. That is my goal for this week of Christmas 2014. At least to start working on some techniques that I have recently learned. I think there is probably something behind this for a few reasons but one mainly. I have had the same dreams recently, the same in that they have the same theme, but different in that the people are different. In the dream I am very angry with the people that I am yelling at, however, I can not get the words to come out. It is as if I am on my last breath. The words are there, but they won't come out and what I am able to get out is faint. I feel as though this is a theme in my life. Everyone in my life has just always said what they feel like saying. Never mind that they might hurt someone's feelings, including mine. However, it always seems that when I speak my mind, I become the bad guy. It's like I feel like I have no voice. I am not allowed to voice my opinion and when I do, people can't handle it. This is going to be a pretty big hurdle for me since I am like a grudge keeper. Do me wrong and I will remember it for like 50 years. I guess that might be OK though. It's ok to remember, but it's the part of holding on to the wrong and letting it fester inside, the unforgiveness part that makes us sick. I would love to reach a point in my life where I don't let people's actions and words affect me. So, I just wrote my forgiveness letters, told the people what I thought, released the negative emotions that I carry for them and then burnt the letters. I actually feel a bit freer. Note to self: do not burn paper inside, as your entire house will smell of burnt paper. Other than the smoke filled room, I think this was a good place to start on forgiveness.